| Whether you have $10K or $10M in assets, the | | | | cards, medical bills, car loans, bank accounts, and |
| division of marital assets does not necessarily | | | | investments. These are assets and debts that are |
| determine how much your divorce will cost you. | | | | subject to division prior to divorce. There are |
| The divorces we see on television, with high | | | | other assets that can only be divided after a |
| priced attorneys and high powered experts, do | | | | divorce is finalized by a judge. Retirement benefits |
| not have to be the rule, but the exception. | | | | and sometimes pensions are such assets. |
| Divorce mediation offers a unique perspective on | | | | The division of retirement benefits requires what |
| the dissolution of a marriage and the division of | | | | is called a Qualified Domestic Relatives Order |
| marital assets. That perspective focuses on the | | | | (QDRO). This QDRO, signed by a judge, is the |
| bases of assets, not the quantity of the assets. | | | | document which instructs the administrator of |
| It is the mediator's job to assist their clients with | | | | your retirement benefit as to how your benefits |
| an equitable agreement based on what they | | | | will be divided and where the agreed upon amount |
| have, what they owe, and what their needs are | | | | or percentages are to be directed. A divorce is |
| for the future. Mediators are paid the same hourly | | | | the only way that funds can be taken from |
| rate regardless of what your net worth is. Their | | | | retirement benefits and transferred to another's |
| prices don't go up for wealthy clients, but they do | | | | retirement account (IRA) without penalties or |
| go down for those who need it. | | | | taxes. Depending on your individual administrator, |
| Most people will agree that the only people who | | | | you may have to fill out a simple form which is |
| win when divorcing people fight over money are | | | | signed by a judge for the transfer. You can save |
| the lawyers and experts they hire to put on a | | | | money by completing the form and submitting it |
| production for a judge. In Illinois alone, millions are | | | | to the judge yourself. Most importantly, once the |
| spent every year on unnecessary litigation, millions | | | | judge signs the QDRO it is up to you and your |
| that were earned by the clients and should rightly | | | | spouse to see that this form reaches your |
| be theirs to divide. Choosing mediation can | | | | administrator and is carried out. |
| eliminate these wasted dollars and put them to | | | | Pensions, however, have their own special rules |
| use in securing both parties financial futures. | | | | and every company has specific regulations. |
| However, it is important to remember that | | | | Frequently, pensions need to be "valuated"-a term |
| mediation is not right for everyone when it | | | | meaning that a pension expert calculates the |
| comes to dividing assets and debts. When faced | | | | value of the pension for the years you were |
| with clients who don't care about money and will | | | | married, arrives at a total, then, based on the |
| spend everything they have to "win" or who only | | | | plan's regulations, informs you what the other |
| wishes to see their spouse financially ruined, | | | | spouse it entitled to. Most pensions have no value |
| mediation may not be the right choice. Sadly, | | | | until actual retirement occurs and payment cannot |
| emotions and attorneys seeking to assign a fee | | | | begin until that time. |
| as high as possible can turn an otherwise peaceful | | | | In mediated divorces, it is often helpful for the |
| and easily agreeable clients into mortal enemies. If | | | | pension holder to keep 100% of the pension and |
| this happens to just one party to the divorce, a | | | | give their spouse assets equal to the value of the |
| mediated and cost-effective divorce is not likely | | | | pension. It is not a hard and fast rule that assets |
| to occur. | | | | must be split 50/50. What matters most is that |
| Taking the emotions out of a divorce, often with | | | | the division is equitable. |
| the assistance of a therapist or coach, can make | | | | Equitable distribution of assets is the final point I |
| even the most complicated financial aspects of a | | | | would like to make. In mediated divorces, this |
| divorce conducive to mediation. | | | | "equitable distribution" of assets is sometimes the |
| Additionally, by mediating, you are exercising | | | | key to a peaceful and conflict free divorce. A |
| control over how your assets will be split and who | | | | calm and orderly divorce allows each person the |
| will be involved in the process. By choosing | | | | financial ability to get on with their lives much |
| mediation, you can eliminate the need for time | | | | quicker than simply relying on a 50/50 division of |
| consuming litigation, battling financial experts, and | | | | marital assets. Sometimes more creative solutions |
| spending much of your hard earned dollars on | | | | like selling or refinancing the marital home and the |
| questionable procedures. | | | | distribution of those proceeds can avert future |
| Lastly, mediation is beneficial when it comes to | | | | financial complexities. |
| eliminating debts and making sure that debts with | | | | A skilled divorce mediator can help divorcing |
| both party's names on it are resolved. If both | | | | couples find the best way to navigate the murky |
| party's names on a debt such as a house, credit | | | | waters of divorce. In the low stress atmosphere |
| card, or car loan, it will take both creative thinking | | | | of mediation, finding the fairest solutions is a lot |
| and cooperation to work out a resolution. | | | | easier than doing it with lawyers, paralegals, and |
| Trying to eliminate marital assets and debts prior | | | | financial experts. I urge you to consider mediation |
| to the divorce is essential to insure a smooth | | | | if the circumstances arise-you can save a great |
| divorce. Some examples are: marital home selling, | | | | deal of money, headaches, and heartaches by |
| refinancing, or a buy one spouse out of their | | | | consulting a qualified and compassionate divorce |
| equity to remove one party from the title, credit | | | | mediator. |