War and Gun Play - When is it Okay?

Violence is learned. If we cannot create a WORLDdisrespect. As they adult in these children's lives, it
that is safe and peaceful, then we must beis our responsibility to move children away from
prepared to handle children that are trying tothis type of exposure and play, and encourage
make sense of the hostility in their world, theirmore creative manners of play.
communities, and possibly even their families.Initially the creative play may look threatening. If
Instead of squandering children's expressions ofyou see a group of children building a school out
angst, we should acknowledge them as REAL andof blocks, and then destroying it by "bombing" it
try to create an environment where children feelwith more blocks, the likely response is alarm. You
SAFE physically and emotionally.can actively become part of this situation by
The first reaction of many parents and educatorsasking the children what could be done to help the
to children engaging in violent play is telling thesituation, or the possibility lies that they may
child(ren) to stop and to even punish theirmake their own hospital to care for the injured
behavior. However, most do not realize that this"people." Children do not chose what they are
is doing much more harm than good. We areexposed to, but the way in which the situation is
abandoning the knowledge that children areresponded to can help the children involved make
cognitively very different from adults, and theysense of the larger world they are growing into.
must search for different ways in which to makeSo where does the adult being in working with
sense of their world.these situations? Stop hurtful language and actions.
Before looking into the significance of violent playHelp children find ways to create resolutions in
specifically, we must first understand theother ways. Children NEED to feel safe in order to
occurrences behind any type of child play. It mayhave any type of healthy development. Make
seem trivial from an adult standpoint, but play issure that even though troubling issues may arise,
an essential component to childhood development.it will never jeopardize the well being any of the
Children lack the cognitive ability that adults havechildren present. Promote development of
to dissect and make sense of the world aroundimaginative and creative play (rather than imitative
them. Since they are visual and concrete learners,play). To work through deep issues and needs,
children explore through play. They control thechildren need the help of adults. Help children
situation, making it safe for them, and thenmove beyond scripted play to more creative and
explore the facets of it. To put it simply, play isexpressive activities that will help them develop.
exploration, thinking with your hands, control,Encourage children to talk with adults about
coping, and practice.violence in their lives. As children struggle to make
Children are small and dependent. They aresense of violent behavior, we need to let them
searching for ways in which to find power andknow that we are there to support them with
control, and play is the perfect outlet for thesethe process. It is very important to legitimize
things. This type of play is an indicator of suchwhat the child is expressing. Explain to the children
traits, and to squander this behavior is tellingwhy grownups feel bad when children are
children that they must hide these feelings frompretending to hurt one another, and ask them
adults.what else they could use when they play.
The influence of violent, media-based toys isInvolving the child validates their feelings,
perhaps the most harmful contributor to violentempowers them without the use of violence, and
play. Being that children are merely replayinghelps them to find non-violent ways to work out
scripted actions, they are not being expressive orproblems.
creative. Children with play with whateverWhen we ourselves our trying to make sense of
surrounds them. This imitated play not only stripsthe violence in our society, we can become very
the child of their imagination, but also can havesensitive to seeing the future of our world engage
devastating effects on the child. It can lead to anin violent play. It is through understanding of their
increase in aggressive behavior, desensitization ofdevelopment, and close observation of their
violence, an increase in the appetite for violence,behaviors, that we can help them also make
seeing the world as hostile, dangerous, andsense of the world they are in.
threatening, and creating an overall culture of